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Joined: Fri Mar 03, 2006 10:26 pm
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Monty Python dump, and all from the same skit.


"Please excuse my wife, she may appear to be rather nasty, but underneath she has a heart of formica"

"Quite frankly, I'm against people who give vent to their loquacity by extraneous bombastic circumlocution"

"Sometimes, Shirley, I think you're almost human"


Fri May 05, 2006 3:49 pm
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CLAIM TO FAME TIME!

The Spanish Inquisition sketch is set in Jarrow, which my family happen to be from and some of them are still there.
The fact that the sketch is somewhat derogatory because of the inbred southern snobbery is neither here nor there.

Eddie Izzard: Good evening Wembley! The largest Wembley venue they've got - 'cause the other one's got a wheelbarrow in it.

I just like that.


Fri May 05, 2006 6:31 pm
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I am getting in on the Eddie Izzard quoting action,

"My name is Pierre. I have come from Paris. I have come to have sex with your family"

"I like my women like I like my coffee, er, covered in bees!"



Sun May 07, 2006 7:59 am
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I've heard all the Izzard ones before. The man's nuts, and I love him for it. He's also the only transvestite my father will acknowledge, so go him!

"You have a longer yellow streak than a herd of stampeding diuretic camels" - Dave Lister, Red Dwarf.


Thu May 11, 2006 8:53 am
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I got the Red Dwarf boxset for Christmas. I love it for it's wonderfully imaginative use of "smeg":

"We're on a mining ship, three million years into deep space... can someone explain to me where the smeg I got this traffic cone?" Lister.

I like Kryten personally. If he and CP30 ever met they'd make a wonderful couple.


Thu May 11, 2006 11:59 am
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"Swimming is good for you. Especially if you're drowning."

"See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil: Rohypnol"

- both Jimmy Carr.

"George Bush says we are losing the war on drugs. You know what that implies? There's a war being fought, and people on drugs are winning it."

"Jimi Hendrix died in a pool of his own vomit. Do you know how much you have to puke to fill a pool?"

- both Bill Hicks.


Mon May 22, 2006 4:03 pm
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Ah, Jimmy Carr. He's a smarmy git, but you have to love him.


Mon May 22, 2006 4:14 pm
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I dislike Jimmy Car with a passion.
I'm not sure if it's his constant jibes at the people everybody else makes fun of or the fact that he looks like a boiled onion.


Mon May 22, 2006 4:20 pm
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ARGHHH! Daily Show dump! Jon Stewart and his cohorts are shweet. SHWEET I SAY!


Yes, reason has been a part of organized religion, ever since two nudists took dietary advice from a talking snake- Jon Stewart

"Bastille". It's French for "Why are you stabbing me? I just released you from prison."- Ed Helms

This is how lame hockey has gotten: the country that invented it lost to a country that doesn't care about it, in a state that has NO natural ice!-Lewis Black

Yesterday the White House unveiled a plan to deal with terrorist attacks on Election Day. It's part of a program where the President, under certain circumstances, could declare himself Caesar.


Sun Jun 04, 2006 10:12 pm
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On the rohypnol theme, with some extra rape for flavor:
"It's not rape if she doesn't remember!."
"Rape is really just surprise sex."

And also: "I tried to be bulimic, but I never got past the 'binge' stage."

Edited, because I remembered howmuch I love Rosencrantz & Guildenstern:
"I can't think of anything original; I'm only good in support!"
"R: I don't believe in England.
G: Just a conspiracy of cartographers?"
"Pirates could happen to anyone."


Sun Oct 08, 2006 10:33 am
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